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itsonlyvicky
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Name: Vicky
Birthday: 8/11/1989
Gender: Female
Interests: city lights & beautiful sunsets.
walks along the shores of the beach.
music.
spontaneity & random things.
movies.
pointless driving.
summer.
Expertise: procrastinating.
Occupation: student.
Message: message me
Member Since:
7/24/2006
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| My pessimistic side about gamers is starting to hit me again.
I haven't had good quality time with my boyfriend lately. And when I say quality, I don't mean actually seeing each other and hanging out. Even on the webcam today, things were uneasy, particularly when he started playing his Halo game. Sometimes, I think guys have no respect for their girlfriends once they put their gaming masks on. They talk to their gamer friends differently than talking to their significant others. It's like, they're having fun (well I know that for a fact) when they communicate with their "team members," then when they start talking to you (the girlfriend), it's something completely different, if they do talk to you while gaming, that is.
I just hate having to repeat myself over and over again (even if he claims to not have heard me, but I know that at least half of the time it's because he's too busy shooting people and stuff). It really annoys the shit out of me, and I'm sure it would be the same thing if he was trying to talk to me and I zone out his words with other things.
I don't see the point in starting a webcam connection when we don't even talk to each other that much. He's busy playing games, and I'm busy waiting for him to finish so we could talk. Well, when he was done, he went to sleep, so I basically wasted my night trying to have a good talk with him. Even a phone call we both agreed on after his gaming was over didn't even happen. Whatever. Maybe next time I should "ask" if he's playing games or not, that way, I don't have to bother him with this whole webcam thing.
And no, don't think that I'm a clingy girlfriend or anything, but I honestly do think that we need to have our good moments every so often to keep this relationship sparking. I guess today wasn't a good day to do so. Does he even feel bad about this? I highly doubt it. Maybe occasionally, an experienced-with-relationships guy would think "Oh, I shouldn't have done that," or maybe "I'll do something to make it up for her," but uh, him? I don't think so.
I deserve better. I'm not saying anything that you might think I'm implying. I just know I deserve a change from him.
And honestly, sometimes when things like this happen, if my boyfriend had a choice between his games or his girl, I really don't know what he'd pick.
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| So apparently my boyfriend double-booked his schedule with two events happening at the same time on Saturday, and it looks like he's going to the one that I didn't plan.
I planned a Carmel Beach trip about two weeks ago, and informed my boyfriend about the event which is going to happen on September 6th. According to my logs, I specifically told him the date of September 6th on August 24th, which was way more than a week ago (he told me I only told him a few days ago which is bullshit; and yes, I like to be exact and clear about things). But anyway, I found out today that he actually has another event happening on the exact same day and that he "forgot" about the date of the Carmel trip. Okay, I can understand that. But he still plans on going to the other event instead of the one that was planned earlier. Talk about being an asshole (yeah, sorry to use that word on my boyfriend, but I was very furious and upset today). Realizing that what you did was wrong is one thing, but not being able to change that when you easily could is something completely different, and apparently, this is what is happening.
What else is stupid about this is that his first excuse was: "I thought it was cancelled." Well hello? I specifically told him that even if our friends weren't able to make it, we'd still go with each other to the beach on that day. But after I reminded him that we planned on going no matter what, he then brings up the "Well I forgot about the date?" excuse. Yeah, I said excuse. I know he wants to go to his other event, which is apparently a party for a friend whom he is not even close to anymore, saying that he hasn't been able to see them this whole summer. And plus, even if you had a plan, wouldn't you want to double check to see if you had other conflicting plans?
One other thing I find funny is, he gives me a choice to control where he's going on Saturday. He tells me that he plans on going to the party unless I don't want him to go. Okay, seriously, does it look like I'm happy that you basically ditched my event (which was hard to put together as it is) for some other event that you found out after my plan? I don't need him to play dumb and think that I'm happy with him going to the party. He only said that to be flexible, meaning that he wants to give me a choice for him to go or not. But seeing how if I were to tell him not to go to the party, he'd be bitching and would think that I'm messed up, so honestly, what the hell can I do to stop him? Nothing. And he knows that too.
As of right now, I don't accept his stupidity and excuses, no matter what he says. Maybe I'm being ignorant, but maybe I'm right. And I'm pretty sure if this happened to you, you'd be upset and would call someone an asshole, too.
Whatever, he's not going to exist on Saturday.
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| I never realized how much I missed SLO until I got there on Saturday. I've been there quite a few times, and every time I'm there, I feel like I'm at home. Honestly, Davis doesn't feel as comfortable to me as much as SLO, which is weird, since I don't even attend Cal Poly. I don't know what it is there. The vibe is completely different from Davis. Maybe it's the setting that SLO is in -- sunny, warm (but not hot), near-the-beach, cool.. Maybe that's why? Oh, and it doesn't smell like cow, nor is it as plain as Davis (SLO actually has nice mountains surrounding it, so it feels less like it's in the middle of nowhere).
I had a really wonderful day when I went to pick up my boyfriend from SLO. I picked him up at his work, then we headed over to Firestone Grill where they serve really, really good food. I think next time I eat there, I should order a "Side of Fries" instead of a "Basket of Fries" because even us two couldn't finish it. Afterward, we were debating if we should go to Quickly (surprisingly, in a not-so-diverse area, they open up an Asian cafe). But in the end, we didn't go there, but went to his subleased apartment to take a look around and hang out for a little bit. It was a very nice apartment. It was three stories high -- bottom for garage, second for living room and kitchen, and third for bedrooms/bathrooms. I didn't notice it at first, but there actually is a golden stripper pole right in the middle of the living room. I wonder what his roommate's mom thought when she saw it.
After seeing his apartment, we went to Pismo Beach, which was only ten minutes away (I thought it would take longer). It was so weird though because as we drew closer to Pismo Beach, the sunshine quickly vanished and turned into gray skies. So that was somewhat of a downside. But when we actually got to Pismo Beach, I really loved how the waves go so far into the sand, yet it's still shallow. You could walk for a long time with your feet in the water until you actually get into the ocean. The sand felt nice too, but I don't think it's as white as Carmel. I asked Paul if there were any sand dollars at Pismo Beach, but he said he didn't think so, yet I proved him wrong when I found a couple broken ones laying in the sand. So after finding out that there actually were sand dollars, I went on a hunt to look for an unbroken sand dollar, and managed to find one! We also collected shells, too. We then went up to the pier to look around, and found beach boys riding the waves, or trying to, at least. I then saw a seagull perched on top of a rail nearby, so I slowly walked over to it so that Paul could take a picture of me with the seagull. On the first attempt, it flew away to a rail nearby. On the second attempt, I managed to get a good one. But on our last try, it flew away as Paul snapped the photo.
Once we were done sight-seeing at the beach, we walked to the small downtown area to buy clam chowder at The Splash Cafe, which was supposedly the best clam chowder ever, or something like that. And yeah, I have to admit, it was pretty delicious. Paul told me they sell their store's clam chowder at Costco, so I should definitely look into that. After eating, we headed back to his apartment to pack things, then put them in my van. It went pretty smooth, I should say. We then headed home around 8PM, but didn't get home until 11PM or so, which we then decided to eat dinner at La Vic's.
I hope I'll be back in SLO soon.
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| So as September comes closer, I now have a lot more events appearing in my life. I had vocal/guitar practice with John on Monday, and it went pretty well. At least, he improved from last time we met up. Now we just have to perfect it, then we're ready to perform. Later today, I'm going to have a doctor's appointment, and I hope it'll go well. I'm pretty worried, but I think I know what's ahead for me. Hmm, let's see what else. On Friday, I'm going to go down to SLO to pick up Paul and bring him back home. I think we're going to spend the day there first, then head back at night. He told me the clam chowder at Pismo Beach is apparently the best out there, so I want to try it out. And oh, I also miss eating at Firestone, so I think that's the first thing we're going to do when I come down there. On Saturday, I'm going to be going to IKEA with Paul so we can look at things for my apartment (and actually take down measurements this time), and then we're going to go to the Stanford Shopping Center for some browsing. I don't have anything planned for Sunday (yet, haha), but on Monday, I'm going up to Davis to move things into my apartment! I'm somewhat excited, because Paul is coming up with us, so I guess that's his time to shine in front of my mom. We're also going to IKEA up in Sacramento to actually buy the products, because I think it'll be easier moving things into my apartment compared to having to carry everything up there from San Jose.
And coming up next Saturday is Carmel Beach. Or, at least... a maybe for now. I was really looking forward to it, but I guess if plans fail because people can't make it, that isn't going to stop me from going there myself. I'm very determined to go to the beach.
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